Hello and welcome to the Mothering in Absentia club.
Congratulations on takin a huge step : moving back into haromony with who you are is a big shift and it takes a lot of courage. Clearly you've had that courage for a long long time. I know you didn't come here by accident and I know it won't be long before you feel right at home here.
When that happens you'll know it too. You'll be welcoming others through the MiA door and as you know that door was the mother of all doors to open yet now for some of us it seems such a simple action to take.